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Prevent Divorce

Free anger management tips: YES To Good Sex— NO To Anger

by Abe Kass on March 27, 2015

free anger management tips, anger management workbookGet the truth as to why your sex life has tanked and what you can do about it.

Free anger management tips to increase the romance in your life

Many couples in a relationship believe that good sex will just happen. It doesn't. 

The longer you and your partner have been together, the more "good sex" will ONLY happen when the two of you have a satisfying emotional relationship—when you feel close with each other. 

When you first met, sex was more about tantalization, touching, and novelty. Now it is more about feeling safe, respected and loved. 

The "Anger Test"

If you can't pass the anger test, you won't have great sex! What is the anger test? When you partner does something you don't like, you remain calm and positive—plain and simple!

For some, passing the "anger test," is not easy. This is why I have written an anger management workbook with anger management exercises to help those of you that are challenged with staying calm when you don't agree with something (see below for a link to this Anger Management Workbook).

Take a confidential Anger Test. (The results of this test are immediate and you don't need to even give your email address.) If you don't pass, then I suggest you get some anger management exercises or an anger management workbook to learn how to control yourself.

Take the test: Anger Test click here

If the results of this anger test show you are deficient, take a look at my Anger Management Workbook with anger management exercises. This ebook will give you all the essentials so you won't react with anger when you are upset.

Anger Management Workbook click here

Learn to stay calm

Anger will cancel out any positive emotions the two of you may have created. Anger is the most powerful of all feelings, and when anger is paired with love, trust, respect, anger will push the positive emotions aside.

Romance and sexual feelings need to grow like a seed planted in the ground. Anger is like a heavy foot crushing the seedling as it is just beginning to grow.

Having good sex with your partner requires that you stay calm. Here are three "stay calm tips."

Three free anger management tips

1. Know when you are angry, whatever you say or do will make the situation worse.

2. If you express anger, your partner may in turn become angry at you and this can lead to a bad fight.

3. When you think it through, you will realize your partner—whatever he or she did—was not trying to upset you. We all have different talents and ways of doing things. The smart thing to do is to be accepting of these differences.

True story with details change to protect privacy

Bill and Jane had been arguing all day and most every day. The anger they had amongst each other seemed to be on automatic pilot! All they had to do was glance at each other, and angry, hurtful words just came out without much thought or effort. (Certainly neither would pass the Anger Test.)

After a long stressful day, Bill wanted to be intimate with Jane. He wanted an evening of lovemaking. 

Bill put his arm around Jane and gave her a gentle hug telling her how much he loved her.

She turned, glared at him with an angry, hurt look and shot back, "Get your hands off of me." She did not want to "give herself" to a person that had given her so much emotional pain!

Does this scenario sound familiar when you and your partner argue? If it does, the reason is quite simple: LOVE AND ANGER DON'T MIX!

Sadly, of the two, anger is more potent. Anger will always win-out. When anger is present, or even recalled, it will always determine how your relationship will feel.

The solution is simple: If you want love, get rid of anger and all of its derivatives; bickering, criticism, bad jokes, and negative comments.

If you want great sex with your partner, and let's face it, who doesn’t! You need to start the romance several days before the big night, but that doesn’t mean you have to quit your day job and stay in bed! 

The secret is: Be kind, gentle, and respectable long before you are to be intimate — that's the secret for "great sex."

The need for everyday emotional harmony is especially important for women. Men have the amazing ability to be irritated one moment, then sexy the next! Women work in longer cycles. Romance comes with long term emotional closeness.

If you keep this free anger management tip in mind, the next time you feel a heated moment comes on, and you will hold back your anger, your lovemaking will blossom. Not only the physical, sexual love. But also the emotional intimacy, feelings of closeness, and tenderness that means so much.

Struggling with anger problems? Get free anger management tips

Get additional free anger management tips from the American Psychological Association. Free anger management tips from APA

Topics: Anger management tips